How Not To Suck At Dating (special double issue)

That huge sucking sound you heard last weekend might have been my friend’s date. Having recently lost her home to fire, she was then invited to a movie about…the inescapable and fiery End Of The World. Worse? The guy knew both the movie plot and her personal circumstances. What does science say about successful-versus-sucky dates? To put the dating world in your hands, or at least avoid imitating a Hoover, read on.

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Folk Wisdom: Your Best & Worst Dates

Wise Readers, What’s the best date you ever had? The worst? And what made it that way? Take a moment to tell me anonymously at this : http://www.surveymonkey.com/s/FXGB657 And next week, I’ll be back with your answers, and some thoughts on Dating Greatness (And Not). Thanks much! Cheers, Duana

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Kiss-N-Tell? How to time telling our (Sexual & Other) Secrets to a new partner

Dear Cleo,In your letter, you want to tell your new date about your permanent but non-life-threatening STI*. You’re just leery of the timing. Many of us also have Secrets, parts of our health or history we know we’d need to tell any new partner…someday. But what day? Thanks to our survey respondents and empirical help, here are some guidelines that should stand all of us in good stead:

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Folk Wisdom: When to tell our secrets to a new partner?

Dear Duana,I’ve got a sexually transmitted disease, and I’m worried I’ll either scare the guy away by telling him, or he’ll feel I’ve kept a secret from him if I wait too long to tell. What’s the right timing? Dear Cleo, If I had a nickel for every time I got the “When do I tell my secret?” question, I’d have more than $2.35. Most of us have personal issues that are important to our sense of self as well as the development of a relationship. Yet science hasn’t fully answered your question yet, so Wise Readers, will you help by taking this brief 6-item survey? https://www.surveymonkey.com/s/S25S85V

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Masturbation + Marriage = ?

My fiancé and I haven’t had sex with each other, but I *masturbate every day. I’ve always felt guilt about it, and now I’m worried it will ruin my ability to please my future wife. How do I stop? Dear Albert, I’m touched by your concern for your future wife’s sexual happiness, and honored you’d let me lend a hand as you prepare for your nuptials. But perhaps instead of stopping your own masturbation, you could consider encouraging hers…

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